Tom JacobsTonight was the 3rd of the 4 sessions, hour-long channeled/meditation/energy-work calls & mp3s to, um, well, process trauma and grief.
I made a video last week as an update but it’s so personal that I’m not ready to share it! Or maybe I’ll edit it after my upcoming trip to the Pacific NW.
Most of the effects are internal, bringing up issues that I need to heal and reframe so I can make peace with and come out of pain. It’s been intense, but great.
For a week I spent a lot of time with an inner 2-year old to heal abandonment. It’s still ongoing but I get the issues and am observing things in a new way. I’d never connected with that part of me because I hadn’t ever considered myself abandoned. (I still don’t because I can’t figure that I’m a victim, but I do need to work with the part of self who does.) I knew my dad left our family when I was 2, sort of losing it and leaving one day, and I knew from my mom that I cried screamily for a few weeks. I also knew that my mom didn’t handle it well. She told me that story a few years ago, beginning with an apology for – when she didn’t know what else to do from her own stress and upset at his departure – saying more than once, “Then go find him.”
But, in my mind, the story of that time has always begun with, “My parents were divorced before I was 3.” (Somehow I made it even harder to connect to the 2-year old that way! People are amazing re clever avoidance.)
So, that’s been an unbelievably important set of dots to begin to connect. It’s a different world with those feelings now available, and it’s all because I’m willing to let them come up and I know I’m stronger than pain and fear I may have or experience, an important tool Djehuty and Metatron have participants and me working with during this process.
For another week I tapped into grief about family issues and grief as an issue in my own family, making great connections between stories I’ve been told by family and some overarching soul-level-group themes my family is processing together, including loss and grief. As I thought about a loss in my parents’ life that happened before I was born, my dead dad came through – as he sometimes does – and showed me some images of other loss in his life of which I’d been aware, but hadn’t thought of in the way he suggested. My mind was opened, and I saw so much. I wasn’t teary then, but I am a little now. And then that lead to thinking about my mom’s family, specifically how her late mom and sister experienced certain losses. (Both are crossed over and I don’t have contact with them.)
One external effect was surprising to realize. As of a couple of weeks ago, my computer was behaving as if it needed to be retired. It was overheating and all sorts of things were going not right-like. I was preparing to replace it last week, but felt intuitively that I needed to hold off.
Yesterday I realized that the programmed shiva lingam and tiger iron that I use for all channeling and energy work sessions – which have been on my desk next to my computer for a couple of years – are vibrating differently since beginning the trauma and grief calls.
In the sessions, we do a lot of deep-level stuff that brings up Plutonian pain and fear so listeners can learn to hold space for tough emotions to come to the surface so they can be dealt with intentionally. We provide tools and do energy work during the sessions, so people do learn what to do with these energies and emotions. But now my crystals are vibrating with a Plutonian intensity that they didn’t used to!
Weeks ago I made sure to periodically move my 3 pieces of programmed onyx, which definitely resonate with Plutonian themes. I found that I needed to by having the box of 30+ programmed pieces ready to sell in a box (pictured) on my desk not far from my computer. About 2 days of increased intensity made me wake up to the effect of having so many so close. They’re wonderful to work with and very healing, but one at a time works best. During energy work sessions I use 3, but I don’t hang out with that many ever. That number just feels right to get a boost when doing certain kinds of energy work.
I moved the shiva lingam and tiger iron to a table about 6 feet away, and my computer isn’t showing any signs of needing to be replaced. It’s done – over. No need. I can cross that off the list for now.
You can get the mp3s (read the details and find a PayPal button in the PDF flier) and I’ll send instructions for using them. Also, I’m making myself available for a month after you purchase the 4 mp3s for some email check-ins/support.
Tom Jacobs is an evolutionary astrologer, energy worker, and channel with a global practice of consultations, tutoring, and teaching. 15 books, 2 natal reports, a wealth of astrology and channeled audio, and programmed/charged crystals for healing and meditation including the new onyx pieces for Plutonian issues of all kinds are available via tdjacobs.com.